Too much informercial...

It's getting obvious that I need to turn off the television set.

Not only am I beyond incensed over Congress and their determination to send us straight to Socialist Hell, I am starting to pay way too much attention to all the swell stuff the commercials are trying to sell me.

It all looks like great stuff. I mean really, can I live another day without a Sham-WOW? Especially if I call in the next 10 minutes ("because we can't do this all day!"), and they'll DOUBLE the offer!

Then there's Paint Perfect, Patch Perfect and Pasta Perfect. Okay, forget the pasta thing, microwaved pasta tastes awful. But with Paint Perfect, there's no drip or mess, no messy rollers to clean, and you even get the mini to go around tight spaces! And Patch Perfect grows a lawn right on concrete!

Pedi-Paws for shaving off the dog's toenails, Debbie Myers' Green Bags so my produce won't rot, and Fix-it for furniture and car scratches. Mighty Putty, which looks really useful for just about everything, Shed-Ender for Echo, HD Wraparound Sunglasses, the H2O Mop, Handy Switch, Loud-n-Clear, Snap-Lidz and Slim Clip. It's endless.

Here's what keeps me from making that purchasing decision: Even if I bought all this incredibly indispensable stuff, I doubt my ability to find it once I have it in the house. First, I'd order it and it would come and sit on the dining room table for a month. Then I'd find a place to put it, so it would be there the next time I needed to patch a leaky pipe, trim the dog's nails or fill a scratch.
Then I would go to where it was supposed to be, and I wouldn't be able to find it.

I'd tromp through the house looking everywhere and muttering, "I know I bought the perfect xxxxxx thing! Where is it?" And I'll drive myself crazy over it for days until something else needs to be fixed or painted, and then the whole process will start over again, looking for something else.

So what we have here is kind of a reverse-rationalization: If I don't buy it, then I don't have to lose it and make myself insane. Plus, I suspect that once one starts taking advantage of all these incredible offers, it's an unstoppable addiction. You start spending all your money on the latest invention or indispensable item, and before you know it, you have a lot of worthless stuff and you're bankrupt.

Kinda like Fannie & Freddie? Maybe I can get Congress to buy all this keen stuff for me?