Off again to UVA today...

"From my lips to God's ears"--today we travel again to UVA, for the completion of my reconstruction surgery tomorrow. No radiation needed is a huge positive, as huge as the negative node biopsy results. Two big hurdles, cleared and in the rear-view mirror at last.

Dr. Lin, my plastic surgeon, called yesterday. I think of him as "Yan Can Cook," he reminds me so of that energetic young Oriental with the fancy knife work, back in the days before the Food Network took over all the cooking shows. He and his residents called to see if I was happy with my "Trial Size Balloons" they put in 11 days ago, filled with 500 cc. of saline (about half my previous breast size). I told him that Bill & I had been discussing it and that we thought what I have is not too small, not too big, just about right. So, we're a go for tomorrow for the silicone replacements. I'm thrilled to be almost done with these hard-edged plastic forms, they pain me like a bad underwire bra from hell, except for the fact that I can't adjust the pressure off my rib cage or take it off to get any relief!

It's been weird to talk to Bill about the male viewpoint of the aesthetics of "size," after having gone through the surgery and everything else leading up to it. Since I only see the top view, Bill and I have differing perceptions of what I actually look like externally. Perhaps, I said to him, you should take a picture with the digital camera so I can see what you see? Perhaps, Bill rejoined, we should just post that picture on the blog and everyone can have a vote? What a smart-aleck I married!

Uh, no thanks (I bet you are all breathing a sigh of relief that this particular perverse idea of Bill's was rejected, right)? Paris Hilton I'm not (nor, do I want to be), and I think we can make this decision ourselves without the blog's input. I do have some decorum left somewhere, even after spending so many days in rooms with strangers with my shirt off! So 500s it will be, and I'm happy with that outcome. Since silicone is somewhat denser than breast tissue, I will be about 1/2 the size and about 5/8 the weight of my former chest. I will be very happy with that.
My back will thank me, my permanent bra-strap shoulder dents may even plump up again someday.

And thankfully, the tubes and drains and bulbs will be coming out too, and then, glory be--a shower, a highly anticipated reward shimmering out there just beyond reach, in the not-too-distant future! At this point, I'd give up almost anything for one hot shower with lots of soap and a super-duper loofah back scratch!

All good stuff. We're in transit or in Virginia for the next 2-3 days. Surgery is outpatient, so we should be home by Thursday or Friday night at the latest.