Someone who agrees with me!

Finally, an explanation that makes sense!

The Kingsport plastic surgeon thinks the pain I am experiencing on the right side is a suture that either didn't dissolve, or was poorly placed where it pulls on the muscle whenever there is movement. He explained that these stitches are put in there to tack the alloderm (a mesh-like matrix to support the implant) to the chest wall muscle. My implants are actually under the muscles, in a "pocket" formed with the alloderm, not riding on top of the muscle as I had thought.

He was just as unhappy with the cosmetic results as I am (as opposed to UVA, who said "Well, most women would be happy with your result!)" Then he surprised me: "If I were you, if I were a woman, I'd be really upset with the way it looks here!" he sighed, referring to my cleavage. He thinks they didn't place the implant far enough to the center on the left, causing the "pooching out," and they sutured it too tight on the right, causing the "puckering in" there. He says this can be easily fixed. (UVA said the right could be fixed, but said nothing about the extra flappiness on the left).

Although he seemed hesitant in "taking over" someone else's project, I told him that while I was happy that I had the reconstruction done at the time of the mastectomy, I really would rather have any "corrections" and the nipple reconstruction done locally, so that if there were problems and follow-up visits, I wouldn't have to travel 600 miles each time. Also, I was not comfortable with the attitude that I should be grateful that I look good in clothes (never mind how I look naked to myself), and was getting frustrated with the large-scale clinic atmosphere up there. The fact that I never see the same people when I go means I have to explain everything over and over again each time.

This doc took the time to explain things to me, agreed that it doesn't look good, and he can fix it so it looks pretty. "After what you've been through, you deserve for it to look good, not just okay," he said. I agree.

We decided to give it another month to let muscles loosen up and relax a bit. I can start to work out with weights now, (he assured me I won't damage anything), and if I'm still in pain then and want him to find that annoying stitch, loosen the encapsulated stiffness around the implants and fix the cleavage, we'll schedule an outpatient surgery then. Recovery would be about 2-3 days.

I also asked him about "what happens in 10-15 years when these implants fail? Am I going to have to go through all this again?" He said no, the hard part was over, it was just a matter of changing out the implants, like putting on a new set of tires. It's an analogy I can live with. I think I've found my guy.

***

For Judy in Texas: (and all others who wonder "Whatever happened to poor old Bill?)"

Bill is doing just fine, tooling around the ocean and exotic Oriental ports-of-call. He is almost half-done with his four-month tour of duty on his somewhat secret ship on their very secret mission. We email each other daily, and he calls whenever he is in port. By the time he gets home in mid-April, my "honey-do" list for him will probably run three pages!