Juli is barely hanging on, coming home from work this morning exhausted and spacey. She is starting to exhibit some symptoms of agoraphobia--not wanting to leave the house for any purpose other than to drag herself through another night of work, spending most of her time either in the bathtub or in bed. My latest "brilliant" idea is to take her with me tomorrow, for a change of scene and a bit of rest and relaxation in the safe environment of Gran's house.
I know I'm needed here, but it is also a strain having mother and mother-in-law here 24/7. I am also out of my own meds, don't have adequate clothing (I packed for a 3-day trip, and I've been here for 10 days), and have things to do with my mom in LA, such as getting her car ready to sell and assorted house projects.
Juli has a phone appointment with her doctor tomorrow morning to discuss her weekend of work on the new meds, and continuing efforts to get her in to see a GI specialist, a neurologist, and get an accounting of what tests have already been done versus the tests that need to be done in the future.
For all of my talk about "living in the now," I'm finding it hard to just go with the flow and take it day-by-day. I am torn between wanting to continue to help here and sensing their need for some privacy, in addition to thinking that a "break" from the scene of her stress might do her some good.
What's the right course of action? I just don't know.
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